What is Santa Inc.?

Santa can’t be everywhere at once, so he relies on groups of trained elven observers stationed at bases around the globe to keep his naughty and nice list up to date.

Forward Base 1459 operates out of an undisclosed safe house in Taylor County.

Historically, Santa’s toy distribution operation has been centered at the North Pole.

People have long theorized that such a placement was due primarily as a way to shield Santa’s super secret operations from the prying eyes of the public. But what is the truth?

Was the remote location of his headquarters, as some speculate, a way to take advantage of the indigenous elf population in the region and avoid having to pay them competitive wages for their work?

Others cite the lack of government oversight in the far northern region and note that Santa’s operations are far outside the reach of both the Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) and the Internal Revenue Service, not to mention the massive regulations when dealing with the European Union or the state of California.

Others note the remote location and limited means of transport in and out, not to mention hundreds of thousands of hungry polar bears roaming the outer perimeters, present major obstacles to industry spies. Santa Inc., as the organization is known to insiders, is far from the only game in town when it comes to global package distribution services. While others have made major strides in recent years, no one has been doing it as long and or as consistently well as Santa Inc.

In addition, Santa Inc.’s researchers are constantly testing the new toy and product markets tracking trends and trying to stay ahead of the curve while still ensuring that the good little boys and girls of the world wake up on Christmas morning with goodies in their stockings and gifts under their Christmas trees.

The real secret behind Santa Inc. is that while gift distribution is still an important function at the core of the corporate mission statement, the global conglomerate has evolved into primarily an information aggregator. Santa Inc. maintains massive servers buried deep within the arctic ice pack keeping track of the naughty and nice lists.