Drapes will only take so much pulling
For years now, I’ve been tempting fate with the drapes in our living room.
My recliner is situated right in front of them, and oftentimes, I don’t appreciate the sunbeams hitting me directly in the face as I try to relax. My wife, on other hand, almost always prefers to have the drapes pulled wide open to let in some sun. This creates a situation in which the curtains are constantly being pulled back and forth.
I have to admit, I’m not very gentle when it comes to pulling the drapes shut. Whenever I’m blasted by a ray of sunlight, I instinctively grab ahold of the curtainandyankitshut.Justtoaddadramatic flair, I sometimes make a hissing noise like I’m a vampire. As soon as I’m away from my recliner for long enough, Linda will gently reopen the drapes and invite in the sunshine. She frequently questions why I like it “so dark” in our living room. This is a matter of perspective. Linda sits across the room from the window, and enjoys the glow of the outside world from a safe distance. I, on the other hand, am in the direct path of the harshest light. We can never see eye to eye on it, so the poor curtains continue to get tugged in one direction or another.
That is, until recently. The rod on which the curtains rest has finally decided to call it quits. The midpoint of the rod is held up by a single nail, and it often comes sliding off during one of our tug-of-wars. Of course, this creates strain on the brackets that keep the rod in place. Recently, one of those brackets has started to come loose from the wall and is falling apart.
Eventually, the whole assembly just falls off the window and lands on the floor. I’ve had to figure out how to get the bracket back into the wall while also threading the rod through the holes on the curtains so they’ll go back in place. Then, ever so gently, I return the drape assembly to its rightful place along the window.
Of course, I never seem to learn the lesson of how to keep the curtains in place. Whenever I lay back in my recliner, I can’t resist the urge to reach up and pull the drapes closed. This restarts the whole destabilization process over again until the curtains fall to the floor in a big heap. On the bright side, I’ve gotten pretty good at re-erecting the drapes. At this point, though, it’s like building a house of cards on a foundation of sand.
The last time the drapes fell, we decided to just keep them off. Thankfully, we also have a set of blinds to keep the sunlight out (or in, if Linda decides to pull the cord and open up the shades). At some point soon, I foresee a trip to a home improvement store to buy a new curtain rod, followed by some self-installation. By now, I feel like a master at the job.
OUT FOR A WALK
KEVIN O’BRIEN
EDITOR
