Fighting an enemy that never sleeps

OUT FOR A WALK

If you got a good night’s sleep last night, make sure not to take it for granted. For the past couple months, I have been plagued with insomnia, a condition that only seems to get worse the more you pay attention to it.

It started with one or two nights here and there where I just couldn’t fall asleep at my normal time (around midnight). Every time I’d look at the clock on my cell phone, I’d get a little more nervous about how the next day would be. Even with healthy doses of coffee, lack of sleep will always find a way to ruin your day. Besides the grogginess and irritability, there’s the unshakeable feeling that you’d be better off at home in bed.

I’m not used to this. For years now, I’ve been falling asleep within minutes of getting into bed. I’d simply go to a random Wikipedia article on my phone, start reading it and wait for my eyelids to involuntarily shut. At times, I remember feeling almost frustrated that I couldn’t read more without conking out. Those were the good old days, when sleep came with very little effort, and I didn’t have to worry about getting at least six hours of shuteye every night (sometimes more if I hit the snooze button enough).

Now, for some reason, my regular shutdown routine has, well, shut down. I can read and read forever without ever getting tired enough to fall asleep. To compensate, I’ve actually been getting into bed earlier just so I have more time to get “in the mood” for sleep. This sometimes works to lull me into unconsciousness before midnight, but then I inevitably wake up around 1 or 2 a.m. with little hope of returning to the Land of Nod.

Of course, this has led me to seek medicinal help. It started with a popular hormonal supplement, melatonin, which I really like because it’s not really a drug and it just kind of mellows you out so your mind is ready for sleep. It does have its limits, though, and by itself, it can rarely overcome the worst that insomnia has to offer.

The next step is some form of Benadryl, which can be pretty effective on its own for knocking you into unconsciousness. It doesn’t seem to last long, though, and I often find myself wide awake just a couple hours after taking one. There’s also a significant hangover potential, especially if you take more than one (I made the mistake of taking three one time; I won’t do that again).

I’ve recently moved into the prescription sleep aid territory, and the results have been anything but consistent. They don’t always work as advertised, and if they do, they come with heavy next-day symptoms.

Eventually, I plan on getting back to my normal sleep routine, but until then, I’ll catch some zzz whenever I can.